This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
