? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize
