I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
