Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
