found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Randomize
