if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
