I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
