We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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