Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize