Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
