At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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