I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
