I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
