Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
