I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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