she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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