just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
