also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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