who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Randomize
