bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
