She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize