just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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