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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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