I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
