At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
