Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Found the puke drawer
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
