Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
