sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
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