butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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