I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
