So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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