I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
PS: I just woke up from my shower
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
