i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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