Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Small penises have feelings too.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize