The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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