So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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