she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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