Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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