okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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