Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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