I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
