he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
As shirtless as possible
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
