We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
