my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
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