Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize