literally had 100 drinks last night.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
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