my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
