I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
My hand turned me down
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
