i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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