woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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