Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize